Sick=No Fun

So I've been sick for the past 3 days. Vomiting, headaches, nausea, etc. I thought I was pregnant for a second. Not that I don't use birth control, but you never know...Anyway, I took a pregnancy test and no baby. So I think I may have the flu. Which blows. Royally. I was stuck home on Wednesday vomiting and couldn't go to work. Then yesterday I had this headache that hurt so bad and wouldn't go away. I finally begged Pat to take me to the store to get Excedrin. I don't usually take anything stronger than Midol and I couldn't see very well so he had to drive. Today, I'm dealing with a sinus infection and nausea...again. Yay me.

I had this epiphany yesterday too. I have decided not to put off going to law school. I have been working as a paralegal for a few months now and have come to realize that, even with all of my knowledge and a Bachelor's Degree, I would still and forever just be a glorified secretary/assistant. I am not going to school to be a secretary for the rest of my life. I honestly thought I could be happy. I love the law and logic and form but I can't take not having control and authority. I have come to learn that I have inherited the trait that makes me want to be my own boss from my parents. My dad is an entepreneur and my mother is a lawyer. I'm not saying I have a problem with others' authority over me, I can be a team player. I've just decided that I have to have my own authority. So I have decided to go to law school next year.

My mom says the hardest part is getting in, but once you're in it's all about "just passing". My motto with school is basically that. "As long as I pass." Now I just have to worry about getting a REALLY good score on my LSAT and raising my GPA a little bit higher. I am looking into classes for the LSAT I plan to take in June. Yikes! I so don't know how I'll manage that with all the classes I'm taking this summer and it's freakin' expensive. Then comes the applying to law schools phase. Which costs an arm and a leg as well. Then there's the wait. I really am going to hope, pray, and fast that I get into BYU. The only catch to all of MY plans are Pat's plans. I still don't know what school he plans to go to for his Master's. He'll graduate this December, like me, and then start on his Master's Degree next year too.

I feel so bummed out because I was really looking forward to getting a job, working, and having kids and now, I just don't see that happening for a couple more years. It's extremely hard to know this because I have no patience. I'm not lying. NONE. At all. To make matters worse, we're in a YOUNG family ward where everyone is constantly having a baby or getting pregnant or buying a house AND all of the aforementioned. I hate waiting. Remember, NOT PATIENT. I told Pat that it's like having a truffle in my hand and not being able to eat it. It's something I want really bad, have the ability to get/have, and yet can't. It pisses me off.